You asked:

I’m not feeling as close to my old friends as I do to my friends at college. Is it normal to feel like I’m growing apart from high school friends?

I understand where you’re coming from … I too grew apart from some of my high school friends, but I stayed close with others. For me, the sticking point was keeping in touch. Even after one year or just a few months of college, you are not quite the same person you were in high school. If you don't see your friends or at least talk to them, they might not pick up on those changes. Then when you all get together, it might feel like you're trying to fit back into an old mold that just doesn’t feel right.

If you're far away from your old friends, it can be tough to keep the closeness. If it means a lot to you to keep your old friends, making the effort to see each other every once in a while can help. Take turns making the drive to each other’s school so you can get a chance to hang out in your new environments. If you're all hanging out together and having a good time, you'll hold onto the friendships much more closely.

If you can't make it so far and are only able to see each other at home, talk about school and your new interests. It sounds weird, but you might have to get to know your old friends over again. If you just don't feel the same connection you did, it’s possible these friendships have changed.

After my first summer back home, I was feeling pretty upset about losing the comfortable feeling of being with my old friends. But I just went to the wedding of a high school friend, and we all had a great time. We all have our own lives in several different states, but we still have a really great time being with one another when we do see each other. It's been different, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s bad.

Name: Liz Cruger
School: College of William and Mary
Year: Senior
Major: Psychology and English lit
Her deal: This is Liz’s second year as an R.A. for freshmen. She is also involved in several campus activities, including pep band and the belly dance club.

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