You asked:

My girlfriend and I are going to be apart over summer break, and I’m freaking out that she’s going to hook up with her high school sweetheart while she’s back home. Help!

Being apart over the summer is definitely a challenge for college sweethearts, but why make yourself crazy over it? Your goal is to make the most of your time off from school, and you can’t do that if you’re worrying about what someone else is doing. Here are some thoughts on how to ease your mind when it comes to your significant other:

• Talk to him or her. Sit down and have a conversation with your girlfriend or boyfriend before summer break to air any concerns you might have. This is a great time to discuss your summer plans and ascertain the status of your relationship. If you both agree you’re going to remain committed during your time apart, then trusting and believing your significant other is a crucial part of maintaining a healthy relationship.

• Never make assumptions. Don’t automatically assume your boyfriend or girlfriend would get back with an old flame. If you accuse someone of something he or she wouldn’t or didn’t do, you’ll create a totally unnecessary rift. Unless you have solid proof that someone has been unfaithful, your best bet is to keep your mouth shut.

• Keep the focus on yourself. Whatever you do, don’t try to control your girlfriend or boyfriend from afar. There is no way to actually know what this person is doing, so it’s pointless to waste even a minute worrying about it. Embrace the space between the two of you by staying busy with your own activities. Remain open to new things, and just have fun!

• Look on the sunny side. There are some positive aspects to having a short break from each other. Absence really does tend to make the heart grow fonder, especially in relationships that already have a good foundation. Imagine how special it will be to see each other when you do reunite. Plus, the distance gives you an excuse to send loving handwritten cards by snail mail.

• Keep communication lines open. Aside from the occasional love letter, there are endless ways to stay in touch with your guy or girl: video chat (try Skype, AIM, or FaceTime on iPhone), email, texting, phone calls. That said, do not act like a stalker and try to track him or her down every two seconds. Reach out when it’s convenient for both of you.

• Plan a visit. If it works out for each of your schedules, save up enough money to go see your BF or GF -- or for him or her to visit you and stay at your place. Try to work it out so it’s around midsummer, which will break up the amount of time you have to spend apart.

Name: Jonathan Fieweger
School: New York University
Major: Arts Administration and Cultural Policy
His deal: Jonathan is an R.A. for sophomores at NYU. He is tour guide in the undergraduate admissions office on campus and is also president of a food rescue and sustainability club on campus. Currently, he works at DreamWorks Theatricals as a press and marketing intern.

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